sisters at war

Are my 2 girls the only 2 that seem to fight all the time? Really it is more Nadia at fault then Liv. Liv just wants to be with Nadia and be loved and accepted by her but lately Nadia has been downright nasty to her little sister and it is really making me sad. I keep telling her that she will only ever have1 sister and that she will be her sister for life but nothing I say seems to work. She has her good moments but it's usually only when it's convenient for her, but most of the time she is awful to her. Any advice?

At days end tomorrow I will have finished my1st week looking after my nephew. He is 10 months old and a lot of work. I'm very much out of practice having a baby in the house. I'll keep you updated on how this new experience goes for me.

Well Jude, it appears you may well be the only one left reading my blog but I will keep updating. As for me enjoying my extra time. I don't forsee any extra time in the near future with my nephew here everyday, but I do try to sneek in some time to read a good book every now and then.

Until next time,
Tracy

positive thinking

so i've been done work for a few days now and i'm doing ok. I know I will miss it and for awhile I could think about was how terrible my fall and winter are going to be. I was feeling sorry for myself and thinking really negativly. I've decided to change my thinking. I really belive that the more positive your outlook the more positive things will happen. I plan to keep myself as busy as possible because I not one of those people who are content to just sit home all day. I find the day just drags on if I do. I'll keep you posted on how i'm doing.

Nadia started grade 1 this year and she is in the French immersion program. I can't get over how quickly she is learning!!! She has already had words for homework that I can't even pronounce!!! I'm not sure how i'll be able to help her as it gets even harder. She had a pretty tough time when I dropped her off on her 1st day. We had only been at this school for 2 months last year and she didn't see any of her friends over the summer so she was really nervous. I was glad when the teacher called me aftershool to say how well she did. Tonight is the offical meet the teacher night so i'm really hoping to hear that she is still doing well.

Anyway, I guess that's all for now. I'll try to write more often now that the summer is over...not that I have all that many readers....for those of you that do check in please leave a comment so I know i'm not writing to thin air :)

Is it fall already?

I can't believe that the summer is almost over. It seems like only yesterday i was getting ready to go back to work and now i'm getting ready to be done. September 16th is my last day and i'm actually very sad about it. I *really* love my job, but it's not just the job, it's how i feel when i'm working there. I'm not just Nadia and Olivia's mom when I'm there. I'm Tracy. I feel valued and confident when i'm there. I know that I do a great job there and the family that runs the campground put their trust in me. Also I truly enjoy the company of the people I work with. in the winter, I go back to being just a mom, and while i do agree that being a mom is the hardest and most important job in the world it is not always the most fullfilling job.

Now to totally change the subject...did any of you give something up when you became a mother? Was there something you used to do that you really enjoyed that now you don't have time for? For me it would be writing poetry. I have books filled with my poems and i haven't written one now in almost 10 years. How do you feel about what you gave up? Do you miss it? Do you think it's possible to do it again? This is where my heards been lately...hope to hear some responses.

Here are a few pictures of our new house...sorry it's taken me so long to post them. I can't believe how busy I have been!!! Life is good though...I am still working lots and camping most of the time when i'm not working. We just came home last night and are heading back to the trailer tomorrow night for the week. I have a teenager starting to babysit the girls at the camp ground on Wednesday...we'll see how that goes. I have mixed feelings about it.

Well, I have lots to get done today so I've gotta go. I'll try and write a full post some time soon.

Update on being back to work

Well i've been back to work for 2 weeks now and things are going well. Work is good. i like what I do and *really* enjoy the people I work with. The kids have done pretty good with me going back. They really enjoy spending time with lisa and she never has any problems with them (it seems they save up the bad behaviour for when I get home). Livy has had her share of melt downs when i get home but she hasn't been napping so i'm sure that's a big part of it. next week I start doing 10 hour shifts and since the days aren't very busy at work right now I expect I'll have lots of spare time on my hands. Any good book suggestions?

Going back to work

Tomorrow i return to work. I've been off since September and over these past 7 months all i've thought about was going back to work. To me work was like a vacation. it was the first time in 5 years i had any "me" time, and i loved it! however now that the day is almost here I have very mixed feelings about it. I do love my job and I want to go back, i just hate that it is so soon after the loss of Rob's dad and our move, as all these changes have been super hard on Olivia. She doesn't leave my side. She even sits on her little stool in the bathroom while I take a shower. If I sit down, she sits on me. If i leave the room, she follows. It's been driving me a bit crazy but I know that it is only temporary. I'm not sure how me going to work is going to affect her. It helps that my best fried (Livy's Auntie) will be keeping her until Nadia get's done school in June, but it will still be hard. I'll keep you posted on how we all adjust.

Thanks for your kind words on my last post Roni and jude! I really apprciate your thoughtfulness.

so glad that is done with

Well, we are all moved in. However, I don't think our move will ever be thought of with happy thoughts as the loss of Rob's dad will always be associated with that time. Rob's dad passed away the night before we moved. Nadia was devestated! This has been the hardest thing for me to deal with as a mom yet. She was so upset. Violently shaking and sobing and crying out for her Grampy. It broke my heart to see her in such pain. Rob's dad was 83 but he wasn't the kind of man who wanted his grandkids to be seen and not heard. He had tea parties with them every visit. he held them on his knee and listened to them talk about their day. He hugged them every chance he got and always told them how much he loved them. When he was in the hospital his room was filled with pictures they drew and colored for him. he showed every nurse, every doctor, every visiter. When he found out he was going to die and they transfered him to a private room, those pictures were all he cared about. We took the girls to visit him on Monday and we held them both up because he couldn't sit up. He reached out his hand to touch them and i'll never forget the look in his eyes. The look of knowledge that this would be the last time he got to see them. He loved my girls and they loved him. Nadia asked me how she would remember him because she's afraid she will forget. I told her we have to talk about him every day and look at his pictures and that would keep his memory alive in our heart forever.

So needless to say, i'm glad that the move is over and that the past month is behind us. Nadia has started at her new school and is doing well. She is making new friends and really likes her teacher. i start back to work on Saturday. It sure is a lot of changes for my girls.